Farewell the days of January

The last day of January, the 31st and I am glad it is. It has been a long and winter like month that continues and goes on like the bare branches on the tree. There is beauty and rest in this first month of the year. It can be peaceful and joyful, cold but full of warmth in one's heart. There was beauty in this month for me but in hindsight more so. Suffering calls us to beautiful and joyful lives and that is what this month taught and showed me. It started off somewhat rough with the unknown of the job world, medical paper work and finding time for all the things I like to do before the busyness would come over my head like a snowstorm. Plans feel through, disappointment and depression crept in, and a wave of uncertainty and holding on to hope and trust kept me afloat.

I suddenly missed a year ago and the comfort of it all. All of a sudden life and reality felt very uncomfortable and challenging. I could remember so vividly what I was doing, starting my path of ECD classes, busy and thriving with tutoring , taking an exercise class, learning how to make baklava and continuing to study Arabic and make Arabic language videos. It felt so nostalgic looking back, things were really good, and I was learning and growing but not in a painful way. The songs that I listened to brought back memories of driving around as I drove a lot and needed some kind of inspirational CD which included Arabic songs and lessons, Ben Curtis audios, Emily Wilson audio, some random misc music and Liz Forkin Bohannon talking about the journey of her company Sseko designs.

December 26, 2017

Baklava for the first time! Jan. 2018

With silly niece, getting ready to go to Starbucks Feb. 2018

I was trying to find this kind of positive and inspirational energy again to keep me going. On New Years Day the priest who gave Mass talked about in his homily how God is always with us whatever we are going through and we can seek comfort and trust in that. Afterwards, my Mom and Dad and I went to Mt. Diablo and went to the very top summit. It was a fresh and breezy day with a lot of visitors but a great way to celebrate the new year. I couldn't help but think of Blessed Pier Giorgio Frassati who loved mountain climbing and being in nature. 'To the heights!' was saying and he thought the higher one goes up a mountain, the closer he is to God. Soon after New Years Day, I was so  much on cloud nine or on a peak of a mountain but in the valleys and slopes only looking up to see and wonder what it would be like to arrive at the top.

Jan. 3 hike with Sibs!

Of course, there were joyous moments this month, beautiful and slower paced. Some days were harder than others and some were easier to see the blessings than others. I was able to babysit and bond and spend time with one of my dear nephews. I have seen him change and grow quickly and get to know his personality and temperament more. Being with him and holding him and seeing him smile at random things or softly and soundly fall asleep has made me enjoy the small moments and trust that God too is holding me, and has His plans firmly in His hands.

I was able to continue attending daily Mass which has been a real gift and blessing as well as Eucharistic Adoration. I continued to stay inspired with cooking and create dinners that turned out well. Being in nature and going for walks and runs has been and is important to me. It rejuvenates me and helps me see the beauty in sometimes very fine detail like a bush, cloud formation or the color of the sky or the bare trees that create silhouettes in the dusk time. Starbucks was also a source of energy and inspiration that uplifted my mood and spirit for a time and helped me focus on things that inspire me to re energize the dull and gray that would sometimes take my mood.



My dear sister, brother-in-law and I and nephew tried out a Persian restaurant that looked enticing for sometime. We recreated eating at one after our first taste 2 years back. The first time was for an assignment for an Anthropology of the Middle East class. And the funny thing was that I saw my former professor for that class at the restaurant the second time. Memories came back to me and I remember always looking forward to his class after my long break and feeling inspired and learning new things pertaining to the Arab culture and world. Lastly, my newest niece was baptized this past weekend and that was exciting and joyous. God's grace and gift of faith has been bestowed on her, and may He continue to restore me with His grace so that I can see all His gifts.

Jesus, I trust in You.

Blessed 10 years later

Today marks the 10th Anniversary of my sister's and my Confirmation. January 17, 2009 was the day when my older sister Susie and I received the 7 gifts of the Holy Spirit and proclaimed to be soldiers for Christ, for our Faith. I had seen my older siblings be Confirmed and picked out Saint names. I knew they received oil on their forehead and wore a red sash to signify the Holy Spirit. They had evening classes for a year or more and chose a sponsor, someone who  they looked up to, and who could continue praying for them and helping them in their faith life.

Choosing my sponsor wasn't rocket science or even slightly difficult. I was inspired and knew to choose my dear sister whom I always had had a special and deep relationship with. Our connection was there long ago, and somehow mysteriously not knowing where it even started or began. But it was important and I knew something special was there, and I think the Holy Spirit was leading me. Till this day, day years later, I knew I made the right choice in choosing my sweet dear sister to be my sponsor. We have only gained in deep friendship over the years. :)

Susie and I attended classes at a parish different than our other siblings. It was known to have a better program and not to mention closer. We didn't know anyone since it wasn't our parish and we didn't go to the local high school. Susie was a year older than the other Confirmation students and I was a year younger, we secretly didn't tell anyone. I remember to be and still am very grateful to have my dear older sister experience Confirmation with me and not be alone. To have a companion throughout the process and commitment of it all was essential, and I remember talking about the various people and personalities in our classes and activities.

I decided for my Confirmation name to be Maria, after Saint Maria Goretti. Her story really captivated me and I didn't want to get too stuck on the name that I chose making it fit with my first and middle name but more so the story and message behind the saint. Maria Goretti's story was one of innocence, purity and martyrdom. At 16 years old, I knew what the world was offering and the messages out there and felt and knew that purity was something really important and something to be valued.

I'm grateful for the journey of faith I've been on and continue to be on. I have learned more about Saint Maria Goretti, and have gotten closer to my faith and the Sacraments. I think your Confirmation day isn't the end but the beginning of a deeper and more mature faith journey. Saint Maria continues to intercede for me as I learn from her as well as other saints whom I have looked up to and admire. The Holy Spirit has continued to be active in my life, and I hope to continue learning and growing in my faith and spiritual life through the wisdom and gifts of the Holy Spirit.

What a Year

Here we are, another year. Happy New Year 2019! I've had some time to reflect upon this past year of 2018 and recall what this year meant to me; the various experiences, blessings and challenging moments. I want to recall and reflect upon some of them here. 

Last year on New Years Day, I went to Starbucks with my mom and relaxed. I was enjoying a really good book called 'The Genesee Diary' and writing down some quotes from it. It's always exciting ringing in the new year whether that's something mire low key and relaxing or more exciting and invigorating.

I tried out some new recipes this year which is always inspiring to me. The key is having the motivation and energy to start it, the time and perseverance to go through with it and an empty stomach and people to enjoy it with. :)

Whoppie Pies!

Chicken and couscous soup

Autumn squash pizza

Pastel- meat pie

I got reading glasses this past year. Initially, I was hesitant since I thought glasses wouldn't look very good on me. But I've come to use them often and like them.

There were beautiful sights including the beach on the 4th of July, going to the Fair, seeing Vancouver and Victoria and pretty sunsets while on walks.

I wrote and designed a few cards to be sent to refugees and immigrants coming to the United States. Even if I never meet them, I think it's empowering to send a message of welcome and support.

There were some challenging and lonely times this year. Each season was full of graces and blessings, yet each felt so different and full of growth and new experiences. In the summer, one of the harder days that I remember brought me to take a picture so I could recall how I was feeling then when things would be different and better.

There were many, many beautiful moments this past year. Not all of them can be taken by a picture, some need to be experienced. I'm grateful for the laughs, and quality time with my dear sisters Susie and Elisabeth who I see frequently and am in touch with and blossoming in relationship with them. I was able to see St. Mary's a private Catholic College, and it's beautiful chapel and campus.

My sister Susie and I were able to spend more time together on weekends and think of fun things and activities to do together throughout the summer and year. One of my favorites was this local and beautiful hike that had an amazing view. I remember this day well.

My sister Elisabeth and her husband had their baby boy later in the year. It was very endearing, touching and full of joy meeting and holding him. I've been so blessed being able to get to know him and see him frequently. Not to mention becoming more comfortable with newborns:)

The end of the 2018 year has been a time of preparing for transitions, appreciating and grateful for all the times with family, and extended family, a lot of growth and learning, and lovely moments that consisted of solitude, busyness, deserts, and waiting.

I was able to visit the beautiful Carmel Mission and revel in the beauty, rich history and exquisite paintings and manger displays for the Christmas season. I now only want to learn more about this beautiful and deep history of the California missions as well as St. Junipero Serra.

Last but not least for my overview of the year includes growing closer to my Catholic faith, some of my favorite saints, Mother Mary, and learning and growing in devotion to the Sacred Heart of Jesus. I only want to continue to increase in the Faith this new year, whatever it may bring! Cheers and blessings for 2019!!