Something Good

 This past week I wanted to make a list of ideas to challenge myself with, to look forward to as a way to keep track of the week better and hopefully remember the good things (big or small), interesting, funny or simply take in the moment. There are some things I didn't cross off, that I didn't start to do yet, and others that I tried to do but throughout the midst and business, or mere routine of the week, it got lost. 

I started the week out with early morning daily Mass. I knew it would be a bit tight for my schedule, but I was willing to give it a shot. I knew I needed all the graces that Monday to start out the day, a new week. It was a beautiful Mass and was grateful I made it there early enough to get in on time. And something about waking up early enough to still see the stars, the shining crescent moon before sunrise appears every so gently, brightly is so special, glorious, and grace filled. A whole new day ahead, what will God bring, and how will this new gift of a day unfold? 

The Mass and the priest giving it was very nice, and reverent, however, not a very nice or reverent thing happened right before communion. A young man announced something walking into the church with a face covering and a blanket over him, and everyone looked at him, tense, pensive, afraid as I was. Who was this random guy making a big scene during Mass, right before the most important part of receiving the Eucharist. He claimed he was Christian, and Catholic in a haughty way very well knowing he was disturbing and interrupting the Mass. He turned around to walk right out of the church and shouted loudly enough for all to hear regarding priests and abuse scandals. The few of us at Mass all got in line to receive communion like that occurrence never happened, returning peacefully, silently and prayerfully, as well as the priests.

That day for me though didn't turn out to be so peaceful as I would have liked, hoped or prepared for. It actually spun  around to be one of emotional turmoil, with a constant flow of tears, questions, doubt, upset, confusion. It was a day that I wanted to end as quick as the heavy emotions came that drained me and took the life out of the beauty of the day. I can't help but think now about how that young guy came in to disturb and bring in unrest and a loud disposition for all to hear. I didn't understand the point of it, but perhaps a gnawing conscience or seeking attention in a way that is anything but peaceful or silent as our world is experiencing today. 

How quickly the turn of my thoughts, my emotions came that lasted the rest of that day and I remembered the nice Mass that morning (besides the intruder) and the list I had made for the week and  I felt like I had already failed. But I had to let things subside before I could regain control again of my thoughts, my feelings and emotions and take charge again to let God continue to work amidst the puffy eyes the next morning. Luckily, things turned out better as I focused on things other than the previous day, and God's graces to help me. 

I finished my notebook that I had been writing in for the past few months (quarantine time made me write a lot!) and I jotted some things down on this last page. "And here I am, the last page of this notebook, so fast! Today was a much better day, better attitude and energy going forward. And trusting God will lead me through, as well as my favorite saints. Loved St. Maria Faustina's diary and parts that I read today. 'Do not fear anything. I am with you. These matters are in my hands and I will bring them to fruition according to My Mercy, for nothing can oppose My will.' "

Some other highlights from this week, beautiful, peaceful and glorious late afternoon/early evening walks and runs. The perfect weather and time of Fall season to be outside. Going to Apple Hill with some family members. :) Nice prayer time at church and adoration, picking up many books from library- about some saints, and language books! Received spearmint yarn in mail to start knitting my project, finished watching the classic old movie, 'The Bells of St. Mary's' with Bing Crosby and Ingrid Bergman. I loved every minute of it, funny, engaging and interesting story line and dialogue. The ending had a lot to do with accepting God's will even when its against yours and how trusting and later understanding in it comes joy. 

Here's to a happy and peaceful Fall weekend, as a new week will begin again!