The Roads of Gratitude

Driving around my sister's area became more and more familiar. It brings back memories from the different times I've visited her, the various seasons of the past year. I used to think it was such a special place, so beautiful, refreshing, truly an oasis from my daily scenery and life. (And it still is!) I had the idealism thinking that it was better there, with her and her boyfriend having great times together and when I would join them it spoke true to me, life was better in that area and more joyful. I would always come back home and feel like I was missing out on something, things just felt more refreshing there and time and memories with my sister in her new living area didn't have the void or the sadness sometimes I would feel without her. 

I would go back to work that next Monday and think of her work, her school and with my school year empty with me in my classroom alone at the computer and students, teachers and busyness where she was. I would think of the streets, how interesting and fun it was to drive around and see new parts and areas, and then come back home and feel the 'same old, same old' type of feeling that resonated deeply. That was a lot of 28, just the deep, melancholy, comparison life seemed to feel.

Yesterday, coming back home and driving across the East Bay with traffic galore, and always the scenic and inspiring view of the bay and city, I felt different. Driving back home was like coming back on the same stretch of road, not better, not less, but a sense of equal, a sense of gratitude. I realized how grateful I am to be where I am now, living situation but also able to visit my sister easily enough, and grateful and happy where I am. That there is a reason for every season of life, and I want to enjoy this one as much as possible.

 Coming back home felt nice and exciting, and to realize all the gifts I've been given and a sense of home is a special thing. To recognize the beauty more close by or just around the corners. It's not about looking back and forth to what others have or don't have, but being present to the realities right in front of me, the gifts and graces God has given me for this time. And to thoroughly enjoy quality time with my sisters is an added bonus. :)

Driving the roads was more of a bigger outlook, an inner peace to take in and create my own and to continue to appreciate. As the saying goes, 'wherever you are, there you are', but to cultivate this specialness, gratefulness and joy in my own living and not just see in it in newer places and spaces, but call it my own.